Review: The Charm School

The Charm School by Nelson DeMille
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

One of my favorite Nelson DeMille books. It's dated, for sure, but a nice romp through cold war espionage Russia. We, of course, are on the good guys side as Americans. Prepare to wrap yourself in the red, white, and blue and give a big kiss to the Statue of Liberty.

Spoiled rich kid Gregory Fisher is traveling around the USSR in his Pontiac Trans Am he had sent over from Connecticut. Let's just rub your American salute to materialism in all of the Russian faces, Greg. Anyway, he breaks the rules, gets lost, and stumbles across a downed American flyer who has been held captive in the Charm School for 30 years. Insane, right? It's a top secret installation and Fisher is about to blow the lid right off. Or will he? Time to read the Charm School and see what happens next.

Or just watch The Americans. That might be more satisfying. Up to you. It's cheesy and ridiculous, but I love it. 4 stars even though the dialogue made my eyes rolls so hard that I might have broken something.

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Review: The Bargain Bride

The Bargain Bride by Barbara Metzger
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Well, I didn't hate this as much as other people who have reviewed it, that's for sure. Maybe because the other Barbara Metzger books I have read were worse. And hey, I needed a book with a character named Penny, so here we are.

Penny has been engaged for 13 long years without any contact with her future husband. You see, that's what happened back then with arranged marriages. It's dumb, but there you have it. For some reason they both feel like they are stuck in this arrangement because of a dowry, but the viscount saves and saves to pay it back and be released from his father's promise. His offer is denied, they are forced into a quick marriage, and there are lots of misunderstanding and arguments and insta-love. This book is silly but she's definitely written worse. I also didn't want to punch anything while reading it.

If you want to really be annoyed by Barbara Metzger, read her House of Cards trilogy instead. 3 stars.

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Review: The Mystery of the Stuttering Parrot

The Mystery of the Stuttering Parrot by Robert Arthur
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

A case involving talking parrots? Of course. Why not. These parrots sound amazing.

Jupiter, Pete, and Bob all get involved with this one, with their nemesis Skinny Norris. I was hoping Skinny would get his comeuppance but alas, he did not. Skinny reminds me of Bugs Meaney from Encyclopedia Brown. I loved those books! Anyway, back to the mystery. We have parrots who hold the secret to a missing treasure, and the boys are hot on the case.

We have a mildly scary scene in a cemetery with a lot of fog, and Hans and/or Konrad (always getting those two confused) are right there to play getaway driver, as usual.

Satisfying if you ignore a few plot holes, and I will. 3 stars.

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Review: The Mystery of the Whispering Mummy

The Mystery of the Whispering Mummy by Robert Arthur
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Jupe figures it out, but not like he expected. I figured it out from the jump. Jupe - 0, me - 1.

We have a mysterious mummy that whispers, but only at the professor. Suspicious, no? Then crazy Jupiter disguises himself as the professor (what?) and the mummy whispers to him, too. And we have a crazy side plot about a missing cat that, of course, ties right into the story. The boys escape danger several times and if Aunt Matilda knew what they were up to they would never leave the salvage yard again.

You get a happy ending with a few loose ends tied up by Mr. Hitchcock. Classic Three Investigators - 3 stars.

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